Friday, March 09, 2012

i bet i know what marilyn's last meal is...

Allow me to state the obvious: Friday!

Two articles made my day thus far. The first was left by a commenter here on this very blog. I don't know who you are, sir or madam, but your understanding of my weird interests makes me feel less alone in this world. It's an article about an artist who has recreated famous and/or weird death row inmate last meals and photographed them.
I was familiar with most of these meals due to the (no-longer updated) blog 'Dead Man Eating.' But to see what the meals looked like was really weird (and thus really interesting.)
Texas has recently done away with the tradition of a last meal for the condemned. Their reason is that the prisoners' victims didn't get a last meal (a good point), but the actual catalyst was because murderer Lawrence Russell Brewer ordered two chicken fried steaks smothered in gravy with sliced onions, a triple-meat bacon cheeseburger, a cheese omelet with other ingredients, a large bowl of fried okra with ketchup, three fajitas, a pint of Blue Bell ice cream, a pound of barbecue with a half-loaf of white bread, a slab of peanut butter fudge with crushed peanuts, a pizza and three root beers. And then he didn't eat any of it. I doubt the other death row inmates in Texas are saying special prayers for the soul of Larry.
My last meal would be a bottle of Ketel One, and a jar of cocktail onions, but since that isn't allowed, I would like a wood-fired pizza margherita, this salad recipe I once made from the Chronicle food section and s'mores. Yours please.

The second article I found thanks to awesome Chronicle food guru Paolo, who posted this amazing review of the Olive Garden by an 85-year old lady in Grand Forks, North Dakota. I'm trying to pick my favorite quotes from this review, but literally every single line is music to my eyes. Please go read it right now. (I just sent this to Brock and Brittney who were both like, 'We know.' Whatever. Re-read it!) The Grand Forks Herald is amused that big city folks find the review so funny. Their article on the whirlwind surrounding the review IS JUST AS FUNNY!

In closing, I'm a big fan of the internet. Have a great weekend...


brittney said...

I take the subject of my death row meal VERY seriously. The menu items change regularly. For now, they are as follows:

-Homemade buttermilk biscuits with room temperature butter
-fine French brie, Humboldt Fog and Stilton with fresh baguette
-movie theatre popcorn with "butter"
-a funnel cake with powdered sugar
-champagne and lots of it (if no alcohol, I'll have OJ)

Derek said...

Chilean Sea Bass served on a lit Cedar Plank over a cheese & broccoli risotto, probably some medallion potatoes and glass of Chalk Hill Chardonnay. You may kill me now...

TK said...

I like this question so much I used to have a standard answer: Shaking Beef from Slanted Door. But the last time I had it there it wasn't as good as I remembered!

So maybe a nice grilled 8 oz. wagyu fillet; baked potato with EXTRA sour cream, cheese, chives, and bacon; green beans sauteed with shallots; a loaf of really good sourdough; a bottle of Screaming Eagle cab; and a bottle of Jameson.

thesoniashow said...

Casa Sanchez chips and salsa.
My mom’s Chicken Marengo.
Lots and lots of red wine.
And the carrot cake ice cream from Mr. & Mrs. Miscellaneous.

And, by the way, I’ve noticed that a lot of death row inmates ask for Dr. Pepper with their last meal. What’s up with that?

Joel Rifkin said...

You are most welcome. It was at the suggestion of my sister and fellow fan of the blurb.

Anonymous said...

OK- my death row meal would be a two piece chicken plate from Sol Food in San Rafael- pink beans and one garlic/one sweet of the plantains- and one of those Guinness chocolate milkshakes from Rudy's Can't Fail Cafe in Oakland.