Sunday, December 04, 2011

you think you're a hipster? please. i'm in brooklyn...

I probably seem like the kind of person who listens to 'Empire State of Mind' when in a plane circling Manhattan. And I seem like that because I TOTALLY AM.

I am in New York!
And specifically, I am in Brooklyn because my friend Dan lives here and I am staying with him and his hilarious girlfriend, Mika. They have packed their 3-story loft with Diet Coke. So, you know.
Last night, we went to dinner at Marlow & Sons. And I have learned that for as cool as Mission hipsters think they are, they are suburban posers compared to the people that walk around Brooklyn like they're in a Sophia Coppola movie.

A few stylistic notes on what the trendiest of hipsters are doing right now:
1. They're not even hipsters. They're artistically wealthy people who dress in whatever is cool which just happens to be modern-ish, hipster clothes.
2. Messy hair! Do anything to your hair! Frumpy, flat, cut your own bangs. Be very whatever about your hair.
3. Men are wearing fedoras with super small brims (seemingly unaware that to me, they look like Justin Timberlake), fitted dress shirts and vests, with the sleeves rolled to show a smattering to tasteful tattoos. But make no mistake. This isn't a Walnut Creek, Structures for Men attempt at hipsterdom. It's like, the original leather-bracelet guys. They all look like single, straight guys who own galleries.
4. Women are wearing huge tops or big flax jumpers. They're dressed like Dutch peasants. It must be all Vince.
5. In sartorial closing, this whole place looks like that party scene from Tootsie, where Bill Murray is talking about his play.
Please run with this San Francisco.
I am also seeing as many Hasidim as I am seeing hipsters. I cannot help but think of the (wonderful) Melanie Griffith movie, "A Stranger Among Us" whenever they briskly walk past us, and I feel guilty about that. But also, it's just SO Brooklyn.
We walked back from the restaurant last night, which was a long walk but so fun because of all the shit that is going on at 1am. There was one brightly lit storefront that was filled with people playing ping pong. No bar, no DJ. Just people playing ping pong.
We walked into Momofuku and got crack pie. Every restaurant we passed was like perfect, cool, ambient awesomeness. In San Francisco, we have those low-lit, trendy/rustic joints like Commonwealth, Cotogna, Locanda, Baker & Banker sort of splashed around the city. There was all of that twice on one block in Brooklyn.
Then a line emerged from an alley, where it was explained to me that at the end was expensive food said to be, "like, amazing barbeque."
As Dan observed, "This is like Disneyland for 20-somethings."

Tonight, Amy Poehler is apparently showing up at Upright Citizens Brigade, and we're going with Mike Farrah.
Amy Poehler and Mike Farrah in the same room? Bring Gilda Radner back from the dead, and it'd be my favorite people EVER ALL AT ONCE...

1 comment:

TK said...

That's funny; I associate those ubiquitous small-brim fedoras exclusively with d-bags who wear Ed Hardy and order drinks made with Hypnotiq. I guess Brooklyn hasn't gotten the memo that those hats are desperately douchey.