Monday, March 15, 2010

what about the GUM...

I know what you've been thinking.
It's about time we focused on roller skating, right?
Well you're in luck! Because according to the Mayor's latest video update, "It's about time we focused on roller skating."
I should point out I watched this weekend's video with "Sober House" muted in the background. Just, you know, FYI.
Gavin starts off in a dress shirt and what appear to be jeans (!) sitting in his office rubbing his hands together like Montgomery Burns giving some pa'tick'alarly sinister instructions to Smithers.
I know I've brought this up before but, honestly, what is the story with the Mayor's struggle with the words particularly and literally. And if they pose such a problem for him, why does Gavin insist on using those two words above all others? We're half a step away from "libary" and nearing "supposably" at this point.
Anyway, Mayor Newsom wishes us a happy St. Patrick's Day! Apparently he'd just arrived from the parade still going on to some degree outside. At the festivities, Gavin got to introduce Sheriff Hennessy with the awkward "It's Hennessy Time!"
Ugh, it's not the booze joke I have a problem with (this time.) It's the bad joke. That's just stupid, it doesn't even make sense, his last name isn't Miller. Who is writing this shit and are they not aware I'm available?
Fortunately, Carrot Top drops the shtick and moves on to Sunday Streets. I guess yesterday was the first Sunday Streets of the highly anticipated "walk in the middle of the road" season. Believe it or not, in addition to juggling and magic (the lit'ral kind, not the figurative kind) they also had a roller rink.
I would leave it to the hippies to express outrage that San Francisco has a fucking roller rink while our fellow humans sleep in the gutters right in front of us, but hippies probably love roller skating. Those burn-outs are no doubt all over this shit, because it's outdoors, physical and rich people wouldn't be caught dead doing it.
Roller skating? Really? Of all of the activities for which we could've built a structure, roller skating won? It seems like such a nerdy, 70's-style waste. San Francisco has always had this good taste thing going for us. Well, you can forget about that. We just blew it with the goddamn roller rink.
Anyway, the whole video it's clear that Gavin is in a very sassy and smirky mood. This is a good thing. I think. I can't tell yet, it's too new. Even when he's going on about the budget and the busses and how Sacramento basically fucked us, he's trying to have a good time.
Again, I think that's what's up. I could be very, very wrong. He did just leave the St. Patrick's Day parade. And he wasn't introducing Sheriff O'Doul.
There is loads of hand jive in this video. Much like his eyebrows, Gavin's hands are flying left and right! Watch it with the sound off. It's like a scene from Children of a Lesser God.
Suddenly, the Mayor is cut off and the video fades to black only to fade back in so that Gavin can answer some of YOUR tweet questions. Selected for being completely boring, someone tweet-gests that like one of those kooky European countries, we sponsor something called "Adopt-A-Pothole."
Eyebrows, hands, smirks-none of them are contained at the kookieness of it all.
Oh Gavin, you good sport! What have you gotten yourself into?!?
And that's about it. I give this video a B-. On the positive, the Mayor is wearing jeans and attempting humor. On the negative side, he's moving into awkward-dad territory. Enjoy!

5 comments:

Be_Devine said...

"I want to acknowledge that this weekend doesn't begin and end on Saturday. It extends to Sunday."

And with that stunning nugget of wisdom, imparted at 1:05, the Mayor lost me.

You should get hazard pay for suffering through these things.

Patricia said...

You are right Devine, Beth should be getting paid, credited and all around great swag for promoting (?) or critique these somewhat...oh mindnumbing Mayoral psuedo Lt. Govenor videos.

I mean...eyewear costs alone are going to skyrocket...

But keep up the good work, it only takes me 3 minutes to read Beth's blog versus the 1000 minutes for Gavin to pronouce particularly properly.

kwk said...

SF almost had another of its famous "we did it first" legislation back in the 1990s when our most brilliant supervisor tried to legalize in-line skating as a commute option:
SFSP (San Francisco Skate Plan)
The basic idea was that young boys in tight spandex would be twirling down Market Street from the Castro on their way to high paying, sit-on-your-butt jobs with the City or the nonprofits.

Anonymous said...

Love the mayor in shirtsleeves. Love the fact that San Francisco has a mayor who can go on for 15 minutes with real facts about real stuff and all without notes. Most mayors couldn't put together two sentences without extensive notes and prompting from their staff. Do you realize how many mayors spend all their time making backroom deals and AVOIDING talking to the public? Good for him for putting himself out there.

sfmike said...

Dear Beth: Oddly enough, I found myself crossing Polk Street on Saturday during the St. Paddy's Day Parade shoulder to shoulder with you know who. Even got a few photos to prove it, and just posted them at "Civic Center." I am so glad to know what he was doing after I left him. Feel free to use any of the photos for any purpose whatsoever.