Tuesday, December 22, 2009

you can just go ahead and put that anywhere...

I really abandoned you today. My apologies. I had to take my father Christmas shopping, wherein I assist him in selecting gifts for my mother and he stands around "ladies" stores looking terrified. We watched a gentleman break a glass he was admiring in a very fancy store and instantly, the glass breaker announces, "Well, I guess I have to buy this."
My father and I pretended to admire some cashmere socks while eavesdropping. A very calm and kind saleswoman approached the glass breaker and politely said, "Oh, did we lose one?"
Now, you or I would probably explode with, "I am such an idiot! I could not be more sorry! Of course I will pay for this!" in the hopes that the saleswoman would say, "Don't worry about it. It happens to the best of us."
And I got the feeling that's where today's retail associate was going with the glass breaker. But he was too busy convincing himself he was about to be sued and thus, turned into one of those.
The glass breaker suggested that the glass was already cracked. He pointed out the glass' lack of stability. The glass breaker managed to somehow suggest the glass was begging to be broken, purposefully placed in a manner in which one would have no choice but to send it crashing to the ground, as he did.
My father does not handle these situations well. I once dropped an alarm clock in Longs and in all seriousness, my father goes, "See ya" and RUNS away from me. My need to lean into the broken glass discussion sent Pa into a panic and we had to leave before how I saw how it all panned out. But here's hoping that saleswoman made him pay for that shit.
In other news, I'm delighted to be Eve's guest on SF Views tomorrow from 4-4:30. You can watch on the SFAppeal or VidSF or SFist or any website with SF in it, ideally sprucesf.com.
I kid... unless of course Spruce would like to sponsor the show, in which case, let's talk about it over your lovely housemade pate.
We'll be discussing the year in revue, so log on and talk it up in the chat room. You can also let us know what you'd like to hear Eve and me bitch about right HERE.
I hope the three of you who remain in town will watch!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I once dropped an alarm clock in Longs and in all seriousness, my father goes, "See ya" and RUNS away from me. I'm sorry for the distress that must have caused, but that is awesome.