Tuesday, March 24, 2009

oprah needs more fights...

Thank God I'm home sick because I'm discovering some gems on daytime television I would've been totally oblivious to otherwise. Remember Steve, the security guard from Jerry Springer? Well guess what? He has his own show! 
It's amazing. Today's topic is "I Got a 14 Yr. Old Pregnant" and there's very little of the guests speaking. There is however, a great deal of Steve Wilkos' lecturing people as he stands facing them. Steve is, needless to say, incredibly wise in the ways of the world. He's also a big fan of calling people "dopey." 
How can you not love this:
"Playtime is over. This is my stage. This is my show. Get the hell off my stage."
And the crowd goes wild. 
It reminds me of those 90's talk shows in which the audience would be given signs and then the guest would come out and the audience could choose which side of the sign to hold up, like "Hot" or "Not" and "Male" or "Female." Some would even rhyme, such as the timeless "Too Fat" or "All That."
Which is almost as good as the constant Maury paternity test. Every single Maury is about determining the identity of "Destiny's" dad. Do yourself a favor and check out THIS comprehensive review of the seven best paternity test reactions, the following being my favorite:
Those were the days! People need to throw themselves on the floor more often. Now Steve has his own show? That's hardly fair. If anyone should've walked away with their own show, it should've been this chick:

4 comments:

Brock said...

Maury is the greatest show on daytime TV.

Brittney said...

When i read this in Google Reader your favorite video was of the dancing man, but on your blog it is the brothers. I am so confused, but don't give a shit because I have laughed myself silly after seeing the Not My Baby Shuffle.

sflovestory said...

The real question here is: is she afraid of cucumbers?! Is that covered on the show?

Sweet Melissa said...

And I thought my fear of Steve Winwood was weird...pickles? Why, they're delicious!