Sunday, February 15, 2009

what is this? studio 53?

My Valentine, Brock and I spent the day enjoying the city, lounging at the bar of the Big Four before heading over to the Tonga Room. It's completely unnecessary that people are made to wait in line to get into the bar, as there's always plenty of room. We'd see couple after couple walk in there, look around and think, "That bitch made us wait for no reason." I suspect the line is done to create some sort of late-70's velvet rope mystique, but making 8 people wait by the door only serves to create an Olive Garden vibe, resulting in no one look cool. I'd love to give the Tonga Room Management a little reality check, but that can best be done by taking a gander at the glorious pirate ship dancefloor
We were particularly enamored with a black-tie-clad elderly couple, cutting a rug to "You are the Sunshine of the Life" and pony-tail man and his sequins 'n feather boa date enjoying a heart to heart whilst touching foreheads. But when Brock and I hit the pirate ship, we twirled until we saw HER. Were I to guess, she and her husband were middle aged tourists, joining the masses awkwardly cutting a rug just like us. As she spun around, I noticed the sleeve of her floral blouse fly into the air, empty. Empty!?!
Yes, yes. That's right. She had one arm. 
You would have thought we'd spotted a unicorn, Brock and I were so thrilled and delighted. It was like we'd won something. Brock's main concern was that she hadn't removed the sleeve, merely sewed the sleeve shut. "Maybe it's a new top?" He suggested, implying she hadn't had the time to snip her sleeve but was too excited to show off her new blouse to care. 
I, however, think that one armed people just keep the superfluous sleeve. Why toss it? A hanging, empty sleeve is less alarming than no sleeve at all. Brock disagrees. He thinks one armed people should remove all excess sleeves from their clothing. 
I don't need to tell you, this romantic conversation lasted us some time...


Anonymous said...

Great story Beth.

The late 70s was truly when the Tonga Room shined brightest. I know a singer that was doing a gig there in about '78. Someone in the band pissed her off so in the middle of a tune she dropped her mic, jumped of the raft into the H20, swam to the "shore" and went home. Not surprisingly, she earned legend status among her peers.


Karyn said...

The Tonga Room - that was where we ate dinner before our SEnior Prom. I'll never forget the Asian woman singing "I'm Clazy for you"

Seana said...

"You would have thought we'd spotted a unicorn, Brock and I were so thrilled and delighted." Evidence of your brilliance as a writer, Spots. That is beautiful in it's hilarity. Well done.