Friday, September 26, 2008

ps: brock's in love with dana king. pass it on...

I'll always love Dan Noyes, as he is hilarious and was an extra in Broadcast News, thus making him Cronkite-esque in my mind. But Dan's got a little competition on my favorite foxy, married local TV news guy who laughs at my jokes list.
Because said list now has 2 foxy, married local TV news guys who laugh at my jokes! Count em, two!
Who, you're asking yourself, is this obviously insane regional journalist?
Folks, meet Joe Vasquez.
Ding Fucking Dong!
Loosened windsor knot, KPIX rock-band frontin', joke crackin', Kokkari drinkin' Joe is my new hero. Seriously, he could not be more adorable in every possible way. 
I want Dan and Joe to have their own late night talk show, where I'd get to be their sidekick and pick out their trench coats for the big dicey stories "in the field." There'd be nightly guests, I guess, but mostly, the format should be Dan smoldering, Joe being adorable and me asking questions about their hair and children and craziest story they ever covered. And we'd sit on couches and talk with cocktails and canoodling. We could have a weekly archival highlight, a greatest hits reel, if you will. 
"Tonight, Dan's coverage of the tragic yet fascinating events of September 11th! Tune in next week for Joe's story on that bitch who put a human finger in her chili!"
Finally, once a month, the most interesting person I've ever met in my life (Marin County Coroner, Ken Holmes) will stop by to report on any dicy bodies rolling through his office. 
I'm giddy at the concept and encourage a letter writing campaign to Dan, Joe and any station willing to put us on the air at 2:13am...

10 comments:

Tom Prete said...

Hi, Beth. It was great to meet you last night at the Eye on Blogs party, but I'm sorry we didn't get to talk more.
Cheers,
Tom Prete

"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that, poof. He's gone."

Brock said...

Roberta Gonzales also stolemy heart. I like how she corrected me, then still managed to speak to me, after I talked about their "AccuWeather technology."

And her shoes were fucking amazing.

c.cass said...

Ah, Dan Noyes. Now, you know who is not adorable. Sal Castaneda. Ack! Hit on me at the Rec and Park tree lighting a couple years back when he was MCing. Barf.

cedichou said...

I took the elevator out of CBS5 last night with Dana King, and well, poor Brock, but it wasn't him waiting for her at the door... but a younger, thinner, taller Fabio-ish blond guy, and that hot steamy embrace on the sidewalk seemed quite inappropriate for a quaint city like SF.

That being said: thick make-up covers a lot of imperfection, Brock's not missing much.

Brittney said...

Joe was so sad when you called him scary on your blog a while back, but I kept telling him that you two, if you ever met, would get on like gangbusters.

You are both fabulous.

Sweet Melissa said...

I only wish you had been there for late-night karaoke where Joe sang "lets get it on" and brought the house down.

Spots said...

I never even saw a video camera! But I rudely arrived late.

And Brit, oh golly, when'd I call Joe scary? Cuz he's not. He's pure heaven...

Blogger Queen said...

Joe was the shit! Loved his big smile and gigantic personality. I've been wondering if KPIX forced those newscasters to make an appearance, if so, they should pay Joe overtime because he took some of us lucky bloggers on a tour of the newsroom and I got to pretend to do a weather report. Yah!!!

I think you should conduct a vote to see how many people would like Joe to have his own show! I vote "YES"

Spots said...

Joe is God.
He extended his tour to drinks at Kokkari and then singing his 1am karaoke version of "Let's Get It On."
So yeah, overtime is in order...

Anonymous said...

OK, I'm in the band with Joe, so there are plenty more secrets I can't tell. But I will say this: the full-band on-stage version of "Let's Get It On" beats the crap out of the 1AM karaoke version.

I think.