I can't believe I'm typing this, but I am freaking out because the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation's website is down, including their "How to Locate and Contact an Inmate" section.
And believe it or not, I need to locate an inmate!
I knew my Prison Pen Pal was being moved (oh yes, I have a prison pen pal) and he was apparently transfered right before my latest letter got to him. Every day, I'd run to the mailbox convinced anther gem would arrive any day. Imagine my horror to get my letter back with the dramatic "NIC: Not in Custody" scrawled on it.
This actually may be a blessing, as Hastings came to hang out at my office when I was working late on Monday and law student that he is, noticed my returned letter immediately.
"What the fuck is that?"
"My letter to my prison pen pal was returned."
I couldn't believe I hadn't told Hastings about this. If you've been within a block of me the past 2 weeks, it's all I can talk about. Ask Vansmack.
"Can I read it?" He asked. Eh, why not? It needs a new envelope anyway, once, of course, I locate my inmate. The second I said "Sure," he tore that thing open like it contained the cure for cancer.
Slowly Hastings read, finally getting to the second page. "Um, you can't say this?"
"Why not?" I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my wine. (Oh yes, I have wine at work.)
"This is sending the wrong message."
Upon re-reading my hand-written missive on purple binder paper, I had to concede Hastings had a point. I should probably omit the personal family and dating details, as well as girly cursive on purple paper. Melissa pointed out I was one step away from spritzing it with Love's Baby Soft and a lipstick kiss mark at the end.
I think my friends are being slightly alarmist, but I'm heeding their advice and adjusting my casual tone.
Now I'm just got to find the current prison of my pal and I can't because our crappy government can't fix their CDCR website. I could not be more disappointed...
*On topic, Kate pointed out in the comments that Scott Peterson may have HIV. I am currently researching this sad development and while initial information seems to be rumor based, I will obviously keep you updated. I mean, I know a thing or two about Death Row and shower sex is kinda frowned upon. Free Scott!
And also, off topic, she sent me this: