Tuesday, June 10, 2008

thank god i took today off...

I did indeed sit alone at the Buckeye last night. And you know, Monday's not a good night. Or maybe I picked the wrong bar. Or maybe I've lost it.
In a bold, anti-social move, I sat at the far end of the bar and buried myself in my notebook. Here's what we have:
6:13pm: Why is this Tahoe douchebag wearing swim trunks to the Buckeye? Save it for the Delta, state school.
6:21pm: My cell phone should be taken away from me right now. I'm bored and want to send dicey text messages.
6:25pm: This was a bad idea.
6:33pm: What is this, family night?
6:34pm: This is not a $11 glass of wine. This is a $5 glass of wine.
6:41pm: Maybe Amanda was wrong about my outfit. And state school is trying to discuss with the bartender what kind of wine goes with Swiss Chard. Jesus. Just order the Amstel. You know you want to.
6:46pm: Maybe I'm better alone at hotel bars. Because these townies are havin' none of me.
6:48pm: I could be watching Forensic Files right now. With those mixed field greens I have leftover and those cherry tomatoes that have like, one more day.
6:52pm: Maybe I should've gone to Noonans?
6:59pm: Okay, I'm officially depressed. Well played, society.
I handed the valet my card. "Shitty silver Honda Civic with dents, please."
"Did you have fun?"
"I think I've lost it."
He stared at me confused. And you know, rightfully so.
"Nevermind." I handed him $5 for parking my car for an hour and went home. No looks. Not one. Not two. I threw on sweatpants and ate those tomatoes while watching some creepy documentary about Roman Polanski.
Jealous?
But don't lose faith in me just yet.
My friend is working at a wine bar tonight. I'll come by and say hi and try my looks out on her...

9 comments:

EverybodyLovesALittle... said...

I was waiting for you at the Redwood. You would have had more fun there. Downstairs and up.

anna said...

Freaky: I too had one-day-left-on-them tomatoes and watched same Roman Polanski docuemntary. In sweats. Where we differ is that I prefer airport bars.

Becky said...

Why always with the state schools?

Generic said...

Ahem.

I count twelve state schools that rank higher than your alma mater, Beth.

There might be more. But I couldn't find (*cough*) Philadelphia University (*cough*) on any lists.

Hear they've got an awesome program if you're majoring in textiles, though.

Spots said...

Everytime I drop that state school thing, all of you "Communications" majors get really riled up.
Note, no one's defending the Delta...

DJTennessee said...

No looks. Not one. Not two. I threw on sweatpants and ate those tomatoes

Don't take it personally... people are just crazy paranoid about tomatoes these days.

seany said...

I think you just sat at the wrong end of the bar. I am confident is saying that I don't think you have lost it.

greg said...

I read this earlier today and on the commute home couldn't help but laugh every time I thought of the line "Save it for the Delta, State School!"

And I went to the hippie state school!

Anonymous said...

State schooled and proud.