Thursday, June 19, 2008
Brian D. here posting for Spots.
I just got a frantic phone call from Beth, who is boarding a plane at SFO and is in very real fear for her life.
"Oh my God, Brian, I'm about to get on a plane to Kuwait"
"What the hell are you talking about, Bethy? You're going to New York."
"No, my flight is going to Kuwait City, it just stops at JFK."
"Kuwait? You mean that shithole oilpatch we fought a war over?"
"It's like Flight 93. You should see the people in line with me. It's like the full cast from 9/11."
"We're boarding, Brian. I'm scared for my life. Post something on my blog so people can start planning my elaborate funeral. Pick up all the flowers that start piling up at 916A. Tell my fans to not cry for me. Fuck it, they better cry." (Okay, I embellish what she actually said, but you get the point.)
Either Spots will die in a ball of fire as her Kuwait-bound plane is crashed into the BofA Building, or we will be enjoying a hysterical story of her journey across the country with the Kuwaiti royal family*. Check back later to see how this all turns out.
* Tragically, however, Spots is in COACH (!!!!) so she'll only be rubbing elbows with the royal family's servants.
at 9:12 AM