But every once in awhile, I have rare moments of intense appreciation.
Gavin, I appreciate how hot you are. I appreciate how every movement from your magnificent body is like God's ballet. I appreciate how you look like a total frat-boy, workaholic, uptight wanker that only talks about litter, hobos and AIDS, because I know it isn't really you.
I know you.
I know you want to snuggle on a couch while you play with my hair as we down really stiff vodka tonics. I know you want to talk about the Top Chef Holiday Special and throw plastic bottles at poor people. I know you want to try that thing I saw on youporn.
Anyway, I'm just saying. People ask me all the time if I'm kidding about you.
Are you shitting me?
No, bitch. I'm not kidding. This is love...