Friday, August 03, 2007

are you shitting me?

Okay, Gavin can not date Daphne "Melrose Ho" Zuniga, if for no other reason than she has an "Ask Daphne" section of her website.
What. The. Fuck.
Hey, I got a question. Dear Daphne, where the hell have you been since 1993?
And what the hell is a kindness gallery?
I don't know about you, but mercury poisoning sounds contagious. And I don't eat fish, so, you know, I'm clean.
Stop toying with me, Gavin. You're making me crazy.

The following video accurately captures my feelings for Gavin. I must insist that you watch it in it's entirety. This, folks, is what's called 'selling it.' And this is what I plan to perform outside of City Hall until Gavin has me arrested. Enjoy...

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't worry, Spots. She's too old for Gavin. He likes children and I think he may want to make them the old fashioned way and not through invitro because her who-who is long in the tooth and can't function like someone 10 years her junior.

You're still in the game girlfriend. Stay strong...your crazies are behind you 100%!!!

Always,
Card carrying member of the Crazies for Spots

Anonymous said...

I am ugly too, so I'm not one to talk but Daphne's face does look like a butt. I love that part on her wikipedia bio that says that her getting a Harley and a belly piercing was due to a delayed adolescence.

Anonymous said...

"her who-who"

HA!

sfmike said...

Oh, dear, thanks to you I've just wasted an hour of my life going through Daphne's internet presence via your anguished links, and it's an hour I'll never get back. Still, to find that Daphne was roommates at separate times with both Darren Star AND Meg Ryan sort of makes it all worthwhile, and the "kindness gallery" is ineffably awful. You really can't make this stuff up.

Anonymous said...

Justice is a cold evil mistress. I love this. Jen deserved to be humiliated like this. Oh yes. I wonder if Daphne is still listed as an inspiration on Jen's website. Guess she wasn't a gal's gal either. Meow...

Anonymous said...

She resembles his ex Mrs. Walker Texas Ranger Don's Johnson. Maybe it's some rage f'ing?
Getting dumped for the man responsible the song "Heartbeat" and silly 80's fashion must still really sting.

Anonymous said...

Why not submit a question to her site like "Is Gavin using organic condoms?" It is newsworthy and environmentally friendly all at once.

Anonymous said...

Who says Gavo wants kids?

Anonymous said...

um gavin does not like gals with fat asses, he is not a chubby chaser or a crushee so just give up and deal ok fat girl?

That Chick said...

WTF ? with the last comment,

Geez, since anon 9:38 has nothing better to do than speil vile crap let's get one thing straight...

Gavin is anorexic seriously his weight is 163lbs. He can barely lift his feet because he has bad arches from his "neighborhood walks" and running everyday (especially odd since no one is running against him).

didn't you read the paragraph on the front page
not to be taken seriously.

Sheesh Anon9:38 get a grip and don't hate the people that are not anorexic.

amy said...

Anon 9:38 = Jen Siebel in LA.
She just can't help herself. At least Beth looks like a girl, not a twelve year-old boy. You have no talent or class Jennifer. Go away.

Jess Drake said...

OMG AMY I WAS JUST GONNA SAY THAT!

lololololol

Or she's some anorexic slag from the Marina.

The bottom line is neither of them have talent or class.

sry2say

<3 u Beth

Becky said...

The end was my favorite. Beth, you can sing to me like that, any time! But you have to make the faces and open your mouth that wide, or it wont be worth it.

Brett said...

Anon 9:38 = please_stop

Anonymous said...

Are you high, Anon 9:38?

http://bp3.blogger.com/_68D8eDdXOco/RreGPMySkUI/AAAAAAAAAHo/0wpbEBZcPu4/s1600-h/beth+and+mikey.bmp

Anonymous said...

Who the hell is Daphne Zuniga?

Anonymous said...

Beth, I love you as much as the next gal...but, let's be fair you are finding joy in breakup RUMORS, which is basically the same as taking joy in another gals pain..

Gals gal indeed?

Christy said...

If Gavin has you arrested, I have your bail money. I will only bail you out if you promise to return to City Hall and perform that song all over again.