Seriously. People. All I want to do is wrap my arms around his divine designer suit and tell him everything’s going to be alright. Unless he doesn’t get re-elected. In which case, we’re totally breaking up.
I guess he tried to get some chick a job thwarting terrorism or earthquakes or something and those Stupidvisors said no.
How dare they deny him anything. He could ask me to shave my head and I wouldn’t be able to get to a razor fast enough. Does anyone even bother to think of the kind of friendship it takes to completely invent a crazy job for someone? Did it occur to that hideous Board that Gavin approval is qualification enough?
When did these crack whores get so picky?
Following GCN’s glowing example of friendship, I’m going to help him out and come up with other totally necessary jobs for Linda Tripp’s less hot twin.
Hobo Communications Advisor and Stolen Grocery Cart Specialist
City and County of San Francisco Mayoral Date Screener and ID Checker
Co-Chair of the Honorary Committee to Stockpile Men’s Toiletries
“Um, hi. Our Mayor’s hotter than yours” International Advocate
Official Divorce Settlement Negotiator with Kimberly’s Attorneys on Jupiter
If none of these work for those “spiteful” Stupidvisors, I’m sure I can come up with some more strokes of genius. But come on. This ho would be fabulous at stealing Safeway carts back.