Saturday, September 23, 2006

bay area reject transit...

We spent today in Berkeley.
Berkeley? You're saying. But doesn't Spots hate driving to the East Bay?
Yes. She does. Which is why we took...
Bart.
I've only been on Bart once before, but before you brand me a snob, which I'm proud to say that I am, remember that Bart only goes to the East or South Bay. I'm from the North Bay and I've moved to the Mission. Why the hell would I want to slum it even more.
Looking for vintage shops in anticipation of Dale's 80's party tonight, Mikey and I walked down to Mission and 24th. As the escalator lowered us into hell, I grabbed Mikey's arm.
"I'm scared."
"I'll protect you."
"You will?"
"Of course. Well, until we get to Oakland."
Bart was filled with an array of freaks and Cal fans.
Oh wait. Same thing.
Apparently, we'd timed our journey with some kind of sporting event and thus, suffered through "Go Bears!" every 30 seconds the entire way there.
We arrived in Berkeley virtually unharmed and proceeded to walk a mile in the wrong direction. Finally, I stopped and asked a fanny packed group of people born in the 40's where Telagraph Avenue was.
"You're going the wrong direction! You're a mile away! Did you take Bart? Are you on foot?"
Are we on foot? Nice.
Another mile later, we followed the scent of body odor, found Telegraph Avenue and proceeded to walk further and further away from the vintage shops in search of decent food. Apparently in Berkeley, finding a restaurant where you don't stand in line to order is near impossible. While my quesadilla sucked, The Drunken Boat was a welcome reprieve and Laura and her vehicle eventaully showed up to rescue us.
After a successful 80's shopping binge (you should see me right now, with my side ponytail, 200 bangles and layers of lace slips), we hung at Laura's watching Oprah reruns and sipping refreshing iced lattes.
Mikey used my lap as his personal ottoman and relaxed, safe in the knowledge that Lo would drive us home and join us at Dale's shindig.
Bay Area Rapid Transit is funny for 15 minutes. After that, it's just sad.
After an hour or so, Lo spoke up.
"You guys. I love you. But I'm so tired and I feel sick and I don't think I want to go."
"Oh no! Really? You should come! Dale has the BEST parties. Seriously. It's a homo-fest."
"No, I'd love to. But I need to lay low. I'll drive you to Bart, tho."
Oh. Okay. Bart. Great...

3 comments:

Sam said...

the sad thing is if I had an invite to an 80's party I probably wouldn't even have to go to a vintage shop to get an outfit. My wardrobe is that old. Or is it me? Am I old? Which is it? Me or my wardrobe?

Sunset Boy said...

80s Parties are always fun. I like your alternate name for it, and I doubt you would do it seeing as you hate it, but BART should be capitalized. I wanna say i am surprised you feel that way about it, but i guess i'm not. Its always treated me pretty well, better than MUNI.
BEN

greg said...

omg, this was hilarious. I loved the line about "are you on foot". awesome.