After passing it several times on the way home and having read the review in yesterday’s Chronicle, Mikey and I decided on dinner at Brick last night. First of all, when you go to Brick, go on a Tuesday. Every bottle of wine is half off, which is why we enjoyed a $38 bottle of Willamette Pinot Noir for $19. Second of all, when you go to Brick, sit in the kitchen, so you can watch the really hot chef prepare everything. He’s from Brooklyn and makes sprinkling toasted pine nuts look really masculine. Finally, when you go to Brick, the waiter will try and take away your cilantro fries and curry ketchup before you’re finished. Protest loudly. We think he’s deaf.
After dinner, we headed over to R Bar for after dinner drinks, where Todd, the lovely owner hooked me up with some Jukebox credits and I got to play DJ, busting out an array of Johnny Cash, Radiohead and Louie Prima. As I returned from selecting the evening’s music, Mikey quickly whispered, “Don’t talk. Just listen.”
A very drunk man at the end of the bar was regaling anyone who’d listen with his recent turn in a Thai Massage Parlor.
Um, guess what. Turns out, they really are hookers. Color me shocked.
We chuckled at his story and went back to our drinks. Later, Mikey leaned in again. “Todd’s cutting him off.”
We looked up to find Todd handling the situation gracefully but insisting that Thai Massage Parlor had clearly “had enough today.” I liked the “today” part. It implied Thai Massage Parlor probably started drinking at sunrise and would continue to do so tomorrow. That is, in between his massages.
“Oh god,” sighed Mikey. “That’s gotta suck. Getting cut off at 9 at night. How embarrassing.”
With that, Thai Massage Parlor dramatically knocked over the huge glass of water Todd had so graciously provided for him. He stumbled back off his stool, hands in the air as if he were being arrested. “Alright, alright. I’m an asshole.”
Asshole? You? Come on. Never!
He stumbled out of R Bar onto the streets of San Francisco, no doubt to go cry on the pre-pubescent shoulder of his treasured Thai Masseuse…