Wednesday, August 02, 2006

i'd have given in faster than you can say 'full cavity search...'

Ah, the plight of the blogger. Often branded an attention whore, forced to entertain people for free, always pissing someone off…it’s a thankless obsession. Especially when you end up in jail. I’d heard about the arrest of 24 year old blogger Josh Wolf from Jackson yesterday, and last night, read his article here.
Oh my god. Blogger arrested. Maybe I should take down that thing about Kimberly Golddigger drinking Bartles & James and screwing hobos on her tours of shelters.
This morning I awoke to The Chronicle’s version of events, reading about poor Josh and his faux-hawk getting carted off to jail for refusing to turn over unaired videotape of some anarchist protest. Apparently, Josh marched himself down to the Mission and put together some nicely edited footage of said protest on his blog. In Josh’s film, you can clearly see a bunch of suburban kids in knit caps stopping traffic on Mission Street, denouncing capitalism and eating vegan snacks from their JanSports. You can also see a bunch of cops taking it really seriously and apparently trying to wrestle with some hippy. What you can’t see, according to The Man, is the anarchists trying to light a cruiser on fire. The Man says Josh has footage of this. Josh says he doesn’t, but no one’s looking at his tapes, even if that means he’s getting locked up.
Cue prison.
First of all, are the hippies saying they didn’t try to light anything on fire? Because I’m sure they’d be delighted to own up to that, if only Trey had remembered the matches. Second of all, can The Man demand access to everyone’s private property? Any tourist with a camcorder is subject to the whims of the establishment?
Down with the Man! Free Josh!
Finally, and this has nothing to do with Josh or the point he’s trying to make, screw those anarchists blocking traffic in MY neighborhood while they protest the very democracy that provided them with what I’m pretty sure was a lifetime filled with cable television and skateboards. Um, can you get out of the street? I’m on my way to Starbucks.
As a testament to this fine country, I spent last night and this morning getting pissed off about poor Josh huddled in some jail cell, and pissed off about a bunch of assholes with blonde dreadlocks, who, as you can see in the video, when asked a question by another journalist covering their nonsense, couldn’t really think of an articulate answer. “Uh, yeah. Fuck your Zionist… uh, what?”
But it’s time to go on with my life. I scanned the rest of The Chronicle. Oh! Yogurt: Dish of Nations...

4 comments:

sfmike said...

Loved your wildly reactionary take on the whole issue, and yes, you'd better watch out for Kimberley Golddigger, or you'll end up in Santa Rita too.

I'm going to arrange a visit to Josh next week wherever he ended up. Interested in coming?

Spots said...

YES! He can be my next celebrity interview! Plus, I'd be delighted to bake a cake with a file in it...

Jackson said...

I'm figuring out how to send him a copy of Count of Monte Cristo through Amazon.

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