Thursday, March 02, 2006

at least it wasn't a booger...

Apparently, some dreadful 12 year old with obviously neglectful and art-hating parents decided to remove the gum from his mouth and place it upon a $1.5 million painting while on a field trip to the Detroit Institute of Art. Turns out, if the museum spends a fortune and very carefully cleans the chemical residue and sour apple flavor from the canvas, the art will be fine. The 12 year old boy, however, will be chased down by hundreds of art lovers in horn rimmed glasses and black turtlenecks and strangled with a vintage Hermes scarf while being beaten with back issues of Elle Decor…

5 comments:

Elliot said...

Both parent and child should have their fingers removed and their mouths sewn shut.

Nihilistic said...

The fact that they knew and printed that it was "Extra Polar Ice" is too funny! And just because he is 12 doesn't mean he didn't know what he was doing - I say kill him!

sfmike said...

I love this story and am amused by the horrible anarchist child. What does an abstract $1.5 million dollar painting have to do with his life, anyway?

I'm reminded of an old National Lampoon foto-joke where the Brazilian crazy man who smashed the Michelangelo Pieta in the head with a hammer is saying in a photo-bubble, "I'm so sorry. I thought it said Pinata."

honorary roomie said...

THE KID WAS 12?!? uh, yeah he knew what he was doing. try him as an adult!

Towski said...

Reason #1,462 not to have children.