Thursday, January 12, 2006

MY FIRST REAL INTERVIEW...

I know. I know. What you’ve always been waiting for. The First Spots Celebrity Interview. Now, maybe I’m pushing the term “celebrity”, but if you’ve ever seen Scott Capurro’s brilliant stand-up, heard him on 97.3’s Sarah and No-Name Morning Show or watched Mrs. Doubtfire or Star Wars, Episode 1, you’ll admit he’s more famous than say, you or me. And I got him to answer my 5 Celebrity Questions!!!!!!!!

Here goes:

Spots: What is your favorite thing about Gavin Newsom?

Scott: I'm slightly obsessed with him too. I went to high school with his crazy cousin, and I've known of him for a very long time. Favorite Gavin thing? His cousin Jenny. And, of course, his HOT black body guard.

Spots: If you were a hobo, what would your cardboard sign say?

Scott: Dressed by ‘Gavin’

Spots: What is the shittiest bar in San Francisco and why?

Scott: Midnight Sun, because they show Madonna videos. I've just given her enough of my time. Really. Why won't she just go away?

Spots: Celebrities always know other celebrities. Who’s the bitchiest? Explain.

Scott: Madonna. She used to bark at me when I waited tables in LA. But she is a good tipper, I must say. VERY moody though, and, at least years ago, she had a very thick NYC accent. Not an attractive combo: "Hey, waiter, I said Caesar salad, not SEAFOOD salad." Back off bitch. I've been known to spit into salads, either Caesar or otherwise.

Spots: Do you have anything to promote and/or pitch? Do I get any of it free?

Scott: My comedy CD, on sale on Ebay or at Books, Inc on Market Street. Free? Girl, get out of bed and get a job. Daddy don't do free. XX

Scott, I love you and your saucy gay ass. Holy Shit. I can’t believe I got a celebrity interview…

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is fantastic. Genius idea! Who's next?

Towski said...

This, dear, is the next big thing. I can picture it now. Last page of VF, The 5 Celebrity Questions, by Spots.

Outstanding.

Spots said...

Thanks, guys!
Seriously, though. Who's next?

buaev said...

Love Scott Capurro!! He was the only reason I EVER listened to Sarah and No-Name. He may be arguable as a celeb, but he's funnier than most.

I'm impressed!

Anonymous said...

Let me just tell you something, Beth. This is fantastic. Your blog, I will now finally admit, is really, really good.
Nice work. I concede. You win. I owe you wine. Whenever you want.
-me

Anonymous said...

I stopped listening to Sarah and no name when this cocksucker started appearing regularly on it. Now your blog will be blacklisted too. How do you spell no talent ass clown? S-C-O-T-T.

But good for you.

emmett honeycutt said...

Wait. Beth's blog is blacklisted because she interviewed a gay comedian? (not to mention, a really successful one.) Like, all of a sudden, you just noticed that Beth is the official fag hag of San Francisco?

One of the reasons I love this blog is because you (Miss Beth) understand the homos. We understand you back, girl.