Monday, October 24, 2005

inquiring minds want to know...

I have yet again received an e-mail from an unknown blog-reader requesting answers to some questions that have popped up over the course of their reading. This has greatly made my day, as I am always shocked and a little concerned, but none the less delighted to find those I don’t know reading this nonsense. Also, this is the most wonderful question ever asked, and it took me some time to regain my composure…

Is Big Chris your boyfriend?

Answer by Spots: To dare, but to dream. Actually, no. Try and I might, I don’t meet Big Chris’ qualifications of illiterate, underage, and panty-less. Big Chris is my platonic life partner because he meets my qualifications of reading my blog, being on time and bearing an uncanny resemblance to Tiger Woods…

Answer by Big Chris: Beth not my girlfriend. But, she does hold a very special and important role in my life: burrito buddy. Beth and I enjoy eating burritos together, getting drunk, telling each that we're both out of our fucking minds, and going to high society events. I've also hooked up with Beth's friends and her friend's friends. Good times.

Answer Part Two by Spots: You asshole. I never even order burritos. I usually get quesadillas. Then I put my leftovers in the bottom of my designer knockoff before we go to Beauty Bar. And all of my friends and friends of friends that you’ve hooked up with all unequivocally deny having ever met you…

Answer Part Two by Big Chris: You lying sack of monkey shit, I've seen you eat half a burrito, say how disgusting it was, wrap it up, put it in your purse, then eat it the next day for breakfast and send me an e-mail telling me you have a tummy ache. Also what can I say ( drunk ) chicks dig me.

Answer Part Three by Spots: Not this drunk chick. Tiger, Tiger Woods, Y'all...

2 comments:

A.P.S. said...

I don't know, they sound like a couple to me.

Bonita said...

Since I introduced them, I get to be in the wedding.