I crashed once again at the folks last night, driving all the way back from Lil’s in the hopes of sleeping in. This morning, I awoke and dug through my bag of clothing, realizing that the only clean clothes I possessed were a crisp white dress shirt and fancy jeans. Thus, I wandered through my parent’s closet and pulled out a gorgeous silk necktie of my father’s, deciding that a sassy menswear look would update my shirt and denim.
When sporting this look, it’s important to add feminine elements, like black heels and big jewelry. I’ve even got a wild ponytail piled atop my head and busted out the door feeling fabulously fashion forward. On my way out, I caught a glimpse of myself in a window.
I look like a waiter.
I quite literally should be serving someone unsalted butter and describing the ahi special. Throw an apron on me and I’m bussing tables at the Buckeye. It’s almost like a costume, I’m so perfectly dressed to wait tables at a low lit, upscale dining establishment. Too late to change, I’m now at work. But I look like an idiot.
Feel free to mock me. I deserve it…