Thursday, May 26, 2005

so, guess what happened to me this weekend...

Working with a three women and one straight guy can be tremendously interesting, especially when we know each and every detail of each other’s personal lives and offer constant insights and commentary.
My boss is married with two kids, blunt and practical with the most bizarre collection of experiences and dating stories you’ve ever heard. She was once attacked in a parking lot and strangled until she passed out, left for dead by a homeless schizophrenic. She says things like, “After all of the guys I’ve dated, I found that the really attractive guys tend to be assholes.”
Margot is married and pregnant with her first kid, always the optimist whose husband is the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. Margot says things like, “Oh, Bethy. This is a sign. He’s perfect.” And she’ll be talking about the psycho with 8 kids and a humpback.
Ben lives in Berkeley with his girlfriend, and is both mocking and protective when it comes to the boys I’ve dated. He doesn’t judge initially, getting me to reveal embarrassing details he then uses against me. Ben says things like, “Have fun, Bethy. Make sure you go somewhere he won’t get carded.”
And Kristin is young, gorgeous and single, dating rockstars and bikers like there’s no tomorrow. Kristin’s got lots of crazy stories and says things like, “That’s nothing, Beth. I dated this dude who, like, tried to blow up his mother during Thanksgiving, but it turned out he was secretly shooting a scene for a music video and no one told me.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You crazy girl. Quit dating people trained in the art of breaking and entering...Lordy!