Tuesday, January 04, 2005

toot, toot, toot on my little whistle...

I'm afraid the party has now begun.
Dori, Greg, Matt, and Kate arrived yesterday at about 3. Immediately, Kate, Matt, Alex and I went out for gelatto, and then for drinks. We knew we were all to meet back at the apartment at 7:45 for pre-dinner cocktails, and thus had a good 4 hours to explore bars by ourselves. So we did.
We all headed over the Ponte Veccio and found an Irish Pub, where Matt finally felt the need to put an embargo on the Napoleon Dynamite quotes. Tired of that bar, with the sky growing dark, we roamed the streets of Florence in search something better. After what seemed like a freezing eternity, we found a happenin' little cafe near the Duomo and got comfortable. Real comfortable.
Kate and Matt were exhausted, having flown 14 hours that day. A couple of shots of expresso later, they were knocking back the beer and dancing around to the music. Which brings me to the title of this blog: At one point, Euro-techo exploded from the speakers. Kate, still desperate to visit a discoteque, started jamming to the horribly offensive music.
"Kate." I screamed at her. "All you need is a rave whistle." And I pulled an unshelled peanut from the basket before me and said, "Toot, toot, toot on my lit-tle whist-le."
Why am I bothering to recreate this stupid moment? Because we find it the most hilarious sentence ever uttered.
Completely toasted, we dove back into the night and after walking in cirlces, found our way back to the apartments. After a quick drink with the folks, all 8 of us headed down the street to our restaurant. Seated in the basement, with an adorable waiter and tons of wine, we ate and drank...almost as much as the folks. My parents are pretty laid back, but it's not often I see them completely trashed, stumbling over words and refilling my glass just for the excuse of refilling their own.
It's at this point that Kate decided to tell the table her jokes...
"Hey Dick! What's the hardest part about rollerblading?"
"I don't know, Kate. What?"
"Telling your father that you're gay."
My dad peed his pants. It was genius. I then got the entire table to sing, "Toot, toot, toot on my lit-tle whist-le" although dad kept saying, "Toot, toot, toot, I'M a little whistle!" which sent Kate and I into fits of hysteria. Down at the kids end of the table, Kate and I decided we needed some alone time. We had men to bitch about and steam to blow off. We ducked out before the coffee arrived and headed to a bar across the street.
Packed with an international array of men, we saddled up to the bar and ordered drinks. It's at this point that we met the bartender, Stash (sp?)who reminds me of the German Stiffler. (Sean William Scott, the obnoxious guy from American Pie.) Literally, there is no other comparison. That's exactly who he looks like. But, he's German. And, I must admit, hilarious. I take it back. I found a funny German.
Kate and I sat and talking for hours, drinking and ignoring the sleazy stares from boys around us. We haven't had alone time in awhile and decided to put it to good use. Turns out, after 14 hours of flying and 8 hours of drinking and 2 hours of bitching about men, a couple of girls can get pretty emotional.
Stash appeared suddenly with hankies and shots of something pink and highly potent. "Oh girls. He can't be that bad. Don't even talk to me, okay. I just broke up with my girlfriend of 3 and a half years. She move back to Amerika."
"Oh Stash!" we gush. He laughed, leaned over the bar and kissed us.
That was the end of the tears. And that was the end of us paying for drinks. We decided, fuck it. We're in fucking Florence. We're going to cut lose. So we did. Really, really lose. I haven't been that trashed in some time. But it was so much fun and so wonderful to share this experience with the person who's been my best friend for exactly 25 years.
At 2am, we crawled down the block back to the apartments. Fumbling with the keyes at Kate's door, two Italian guys stop and invite us to join them at a disco. Kate was feeling it, but I have an aversion to both Eurotrash and elastic waist jeans and nixed the invite.
I passed out soon after, and awoke this morning with a pounding headache and apparently, a new job. (more about that from home, but I got an awesome e-mail officially offering me something I've wanted forever. Yippee!)
Today, after shopping with mom, Kate and I joined Dori, Greg, and Matt for lunch. While walking past the Duomo, we actually spotted the guys who invited us to the disco last night. I hid behind Greg and avoided eye contact.
We then went over and saw Jenny, back TODAY from Thailand. Jen's a new woman, having traveled the world for months. She's here for a year, returning to San Francisco in June, and it's so wonderful to see her. It's amazing how much she's matured, with this new confidence and sophistication. It's so exciting to see my little Jen and hear about her adventures, and I can't wait to meet up with all of her friends at some bar tonight.
Obviously, there are museums and cathedrals and culture to explore. I certainly plan to and will probably get around to it. But all I have to say right now is...

Toot, toot, toot on my lit-tle whist-le...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are in the capital of ART!
Breathe it in!
Soak it up!
AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Anonymous said...

Keep up the good work »