Saturday, October 23, 2004

home sweet home...

916A rules.
Sometimes you need to go out, get trashed, and hook up with a DJ. And sometimes, you need to stay home, sit around the dining room table, and spend hours laughing with your friends. That's what I did last night, and it was awesome.
The new Chris, (that's what we call my election night intern) came over last night, to help me prepare questions for the politicians appearing on the show, and Andy came over to help. Bonnie, who couldn't care less about local politics, assisted by ordering Chinese food and sassing everybody. We sat around the dining room for an eternity, debating stem cell research and fortune cookie alotment. It was marvelous.
At 10, Chris, having experienced the heaven that is 916A, had to run off to some benefit, and Andy and Bonnie got to comparing notes on the blog. I'm sore from laughing. I laughed so hard, I actually fell off the chair. Why? Because Bonnie and Andy pointed out that they've been made into blog characters, edited Real World style into stereotypical personalities. It's so fucking true. You'd have to be an avid reader of the blog to notice it, but they have a really good point.
Bonnie is the "drunk whore" and Andy is the "gay stoner."
Bonnie asserts that she's always portrayed trashed and slutty, falling down stairs or breaking heels, and stumbling out of some hotel side door at 8am. (true, true, true.)
Andy insists he's portrayed as the flaming homosexual weed addict, having constant wacky and wild adventures. "Apparently, every time I go out in public, it's crazy hilarity." (true, true, true.)
I think this is exactly what I want. I mean, at the toga party, I introduced someone to Andy and they said, "Oh Andy! From the blog!"
Quit your complaining, slut and queen. I've made you immortal.

Today is Phillip and Michael's wedding in Sausalito. My parent's and brother are going, this being their first gay committment ceremony, and Andy and I are, of course, going together. Andy, wanting to steal the thunder of my low cut Nicole Fahri gown, bought himself a stunning Kenneth Cole pinstriped suit. As soon as he arrived, Bonnie and I insist he model it for us, to which he aggreed immediately. 30 minutes later (!), he emerges from my room, looking spectacular, twirling around the house admiring himself.
Yeah. I'm the one that makes him look like a nelly queen.

We had a lovely time last night. And even though I almost crashed into a black Lexus at Castro and Market driving Andy home, I'd do this every night. I love you guys.

And now, a personal and confidential note to B and A: The greatest line of last night...
"Do you want to be First Lady or not!!!"


AndyJolley said...

LOL, Well........Do you wanna be first lady or not!!!! Brilliant Blog posting, as always. I was also thinking, we are so liberal! It's not only a gay wedding, it's an interracial gay wedding! Fabulous! Not as fabulous as if it was my gay wedding though! :) But I'm no hater! This is going to be so cool......never been to a wedding of gay men before, go figure, because it RARELY happens! Lesbian weddings are a dime a dozen I'm sure. What is wrong with gay men? Reminds me of THE joke. I'll post it for the benefit of your readers, who may not be privvy to Gay jokes,and have not heard it before. OK, here thing on??
What do Lesbians bring on a secing date?
A U-Haul!
What do gay men bring on a second date?
What second date????? it's good to see some gay men out there actually want to make a commitment!
Wow.....Nuff said.

Spots said...

You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need...

Anonymous said...

Bonnie falls out of jeep's too.


Spots said...

If I listed all the times that Bonnie has fallen on her ass while shitfaced, (although, that was a god one), I'd never be able to write about anything else. That's what she gets for wearing fabulous heels...

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