Yesterday, Bonnie, Gert, Andy, Big Chris, and I sat around the house doing nothing but eating, drinking, and watching movies on TNT. By 7, we were hungry and decided to call my parents and see what they were having for dinner. Alarmed at the prospect of 5 univited guests for dinner, my mother thought she could get away with inviting us to dinner the next night, fully expecting no one to show. To her hidden dismay, this afternoon I called to tell her that 3 of us would partake of her generous offer for free flank steak.
Most of my friends have dined at Casa Spots and enjoyed the never-ending bar that is my parent's home. My parents are pretty laid back and easy to hang out with, but I still view them as parents. Friends come over all the time, and end up doing shots of Hungarian vodka with my dad or get roped into playing pranks on my 90 year old grandma by my mom. In fact, it's hard to be friends with me, and not have partied at the Spotswood estate and grounds. Chris, however, has never been there, and I must admit, I was a tad nervous. Chris calls my brother Gary because he can never remeber his name. Chris loves to regale crowds with the tale of the time we made out while his pants were removed by a third party. Chris will gladly describe for anyone, willing or not, a sex act called "The Shocker."
To his credit, he behaved admirably. Bonnie, on the other hand, resumed her role of shouting explatives across the dinner table and wrestling with my brother. She, however, is half Spots anyway, and has learned how to survive dinner at my folks. Chris is a slower learner. At one point, in an attempt to get a word in edgewise, he actually raised his hand. Nice try, rookie.
I learned in pre-school, to speak at the Spotswood table, you've got to yell, slam things, swear, and to get anyone to even listen, say something genius or hilarious. Hand raising is for babies. Throw a roll if you need to make a point. But, no one will respect you if you don't dive in. It's verbal sinking and swimming, and god bless him, Chris swam.
Actually, I love having friends for dinner with my parents. I regard them as incredibly easy to chill with, and to their credit, they never let your glass get empty. I pointed this out to Bonnie once, and she said, "Yeah. Your family parties are awesome and everyone has fun...if they're willing to perform a fucking skit."